19Harry Potter and the Sword of Gryffindor

19Harry Potter and the Sword of Gryffindor

Harry Potter and the Sword of Gryffindor
Chapter Nineteen: It's So Very Hard Being Sorry.

Disclaimer: Not mine, I own nothing. I'm not making any money

WARNING: Harsh Language, adult themes, sexual situations (i.e. smut), bad spelling and grammar.

Author's Notes: This story is a broad farce with over the top humor (a good deal of it is crude and sexual) and OOC actions (that's Out Of Character if you don't know). Also, this is my first smut-ish fic. If you don't like sex and sex-based humor, do NOT read this!

Chapter Nineteen Summary: Harry and Hermione fight while Ron gets the point.

You Know Who Sends Minister Biscuit Bouquet of DEATH!

Special Report by Sarah Chambers for the Daily Prophet.

The body of Rufus Scrimgeour, Minister of Magic, was found in his office early this morning by the cleaning crew.

The Magical Law Enforcement has not released an official statement yet, but inside sources tells this reporter that the Minister received a gift from an anonymous citizen late yesterday.

"It looked like a bunch of harmless biscuits in a wicker basket," my source told me. "I gave one of them to the misses last year."

But alas, it wasn't harmless. Either He Who Must Not Be Named or one of his followers charmed the biscuits to be implements of a heinous murder! The tiny chocolate chip filled treats were bewitched to fly and cram themselves into the Minister's nose and mouth totally blocking the victim's air passages.

"Oh, it was 'orrible," Festus Montgomery, the janitor who found Scrimgeour's body, said sadly. "He 'ad two biscuits in each nostril and a couple dozen jammed in his gob."

With his airway blocked by biscuits, the Minister slowly suffocated in a horrible chocolaty and crispy manner.

The interim Minister is S. Pippin. Until yesterday, Miss Pippin was the Under-Secretary in charge of Wizard-Goblin relations. An emergency session of the Wizengamot will commence later this afternoon to elect a new Minister. Interim-Minister Pippin hopes to sway the Wizengamot in hopes of making her new position permanent.

As to the motive to Minister Scrimgeour's killing, there is talk in the halls of the Ministry that he was targeted in retaliation for the recent raids against suspected Death Eaters. A number of previously unknown Death Eaters were taken into custody when they were named by Hogwarts student turned Death Eater, Draco Malfoy. Malfoy could not be reached for comments as he is still recovering at St. Mungo's. Mr. Malfoy's injuries are said to have occurred while practicing what is commonly known as "rough sex" with his rumored life-partner, Harry Potter.


Harry was not in a jolly mood. To be more accurate, one would call his mood "angry" or even "pissed off." It wasn't just the news of Scrimgeour's assassination that brought him down so much. Nor the more troubling fact that the Daily Prophet was still convinced that he and Draco were gay lovers. No, his mood came from the fact that Hermione hadn't touched him in days. Yes, Harry was upset that Voldemort had struck such a blow. However Harry hadn't gotten any play since his hint at suggesting a three way.

Hermione was being very cool toward Harry. For two full days after he made the typical male mistake of actually speaking what was on his mind, Hermione made it a point not to stay in the same room as Harry. And as if she didn't think Harry was getting the hint that she was ignoring him, on the third day Hermione started to make it obvious by sitting opposite of him during meals but refusing to look in his direction or even acknowledge his presence.

A number of house-elves took a great amount of joy in Harry's suffering. Apparently it was big news with the house-elves that the Great One and the One of the Mark were on the outs. The tiny creatures would laugh at Harry while making obscene gestures at him. Sometimes, Harry could even hear them sing in the kitchen as he walked by:

"The One of the Mark don't be getting any!

Soon his nuts do be shriveling!

Which makes we's all happies!'

The One of the Mark don't be getting any!"

/It wasn't hard to believe, but /'Harry, Jr.' was taking this dry spell worse than Harry was. The organ sulked about all day long and would often take its frustration out on its luggage. It wasn't long before 'Harry, Jr.'s baggage turned an interesting shade of puce. Harry tried to alleviate his discomfort with his own hand, but 'Harry, Jr.' would have none of it. Whenever Harry would try to wank off, the organ refused to play. As if it was saying that it wouldn't play with anyone but Hermione.

Over a week after the "three-way faux pas" incident, Harry was in a sour mood and sitting alone in the Common Room. Hermione was in the library studying while Ron and Luna were in his room having sex. Harry took offence at Ron and Luna's actions; they were mocking the fact that he hadn't had sex in days whereas they would seemingly only take breaks for a snack before going at it again.

A startled and painful scream emanated from Harry and Ron's room. Harry grabbed his wand and dashed up the stairs to find a naked Ron staggering out into the hall while clutching his bottom.

"Ron, what's wrong?" demanded Harry as he desperately tried to not look at Ron below his shoulders. "Are you hurt?"

"Yes I am," snapped Ron. "Bloody hell!"

"Is Luna okay?"

"Oh, she's fine," Ron said bitterly. "She's the one who hurt me."

"What happened?" Harry demanded. He was irritated that Ron wasn't answering him directly… that and Harry was upset over seeing Ron naked… again.

"Well, Luna was… /you know/… while I was on my back…" Ron began. It was clear that he was very upset and deeply embarrassed.

"Riding you?" Harry asked for clarification. Ron's description of "you know" wasn't very enlightening. As Harry knew from experience, there were a number of things one can do on one's back.

"She was blowing me, okay!" snapped Ron. "Anyway, she stopped and she started talking. I don't know what she was saying because I wasn't paying too much attention to what she was saying, you know what I mean."

Harry did in fact know what Ron meant this time. When Hermione pleasured Harry, he never paid too much attention to anything else.

"But I thought she was talking to someone," Ron continued while still clutching his bum. "Then I heard her say something like 'are you sure he'll like it?' Then the next thing I know… she…she… it hurt!"

"What did she do?" Harry asked. He was wondering if she had accidentally hexed him. Or perhaps she used her teeth. But that wouldn't explain why Ron was holding onto his naked backside.

"Ron, what the hell did she do?" Harry repeated when the red haired wizard hesitated to answer.

"It was that bloody ghost again!" Ron blurted out.

"What ghost?" Harry asked. But the sick and worried expression on Ron's face told Harry the answer. "Gryffindor!"

"He told her to… do something to me." Ron said vaguely.

It slowly dawned upon Harry. He recalled the time Gryffindor watched and critiqued Harry's cunnilingus and Hermione's fellatio and how the perverted old ghost suggested that Hermione should stick her finger into Harry's bum while she blew him. It was clear that Gryffindor had given Luna this same advice and, unlike Hermione, she had followed through.

"Ow," Harry mutter sympathetically.

"'/Ow//'/ he says," Ron grumbled. "You weren't the one who got a finger stabbed in his hole."

Grumbling about how "the mood" was ruined, Ron sulked off to the showers. A giggle sounded from the room Ron just exited.

"Hermione does get quiet wet doesn't she?" Luna commented happily.

Harry opened the door to find Luna, with a bed sheet wrapped around her like a improvised toga, sitting across from the ghost of Gryffindor. While Luna was being polite and looking Gryffindor in the eye, the ghost was staring directly into the blonde witch's ample cleavage.

"That boy has one powerful tongue," Gryffindor speculated. "Maybe you should have him give a go on you."

"Oh, no, I'd never do that," Luna said calmly as if it was a normal occurrence for a ghost of a Hogwarts' founder to suggest that she should cheat on her husband. "Besides, I've asked Harry to give Ronald tips on cunnilingus."

"Maybe they would let Ron… and me… watch Harry work?" Gryffindor said hopefully.

"I could join in and observe as well," Luna added dreamily. "It would be wonderful to learn something new. I am a Ravenclaw after all and I do so love to learn new things!"

"Great!" exclaimed Gryffindor. "And if the boy gets tired, you can hop in and finish Hermione off."

Luna responded by giving the ghost a disapproving eye. Seeing that Gryffindor was blatantly looking down her ample cleavage, he didn't see this look.

"I take it you got bored with Mrs. Black?" Harry asked and finally announced his presence.

"Goodness no, boy," the ghost exclaimed. "I tired her out."

"How the hell do you tire out a magical painting?" Harry asked and immediately regretted the question because Gryffindor replied by giving Harry a rather rude gesture with his tongue and two fingers.

"Harry, Godric brought up a good point," Luna stated.

Harry was stunned, Luna was agreeing with Gryffindor!

"Which point was that, love?" the ghost asked. "Was it about the bum-plug, gurgling, hammock, or watching?"

Apparently while Ron and Harry had been talking outside the room, Luna and Gryffindor had been discussing a number of things.

"The watching," Luna said dreamily.

"LUNA!" Harry ejaculated in surprise… not that way you dirty minded pervs.

/ /"Harry, you are obviously very good at pleasuring Hermione with your tongue," Luna explained. "From what Hermione and I have discussed, a portion of your art lies in your technique, not just your Parselmouth abilities. And Ronald would be too embarrassed to talk to you about such techniques."

"But he would be less embarrassed if he watched me eat out Hermione?" Harry asked in shock.

"I could give him the proper motivation," explained Luna. "The reason wouldn't be out of pure perversion if Ronald and I watch; our relationship would benefit from what we learned."

"You noticed she said it wouldn't be /'pure perversion'/," Gryffindor commented. "That means a part of her would like to watch."

"Yes, Harry and Hermione make an attractive couple," admitted Luna. "However, my main interest is that Ronald is a visual learner; if he watches you perform cunnilingus, he may be able to use the techniques on me."

Harry was completely stunned. He stood in the doorway with his mouth opening and closing like a fish. Luna was requesting a show! She tried to sugar coat it, but as Gryffindor pointed out, she still wanted to watch Harry eat out Hermione!

"Think about it, won't you?" requested Luna as she stood up and walked to Harry. The blonde witch placed a friendly kiss on Harry's cheek before adding, "Who knows, maybe Ronald and I will return the favor and you two can watch us?"

Harry was completely flummoxed; not only had Luna wanted to watch Harry and Hermione, but she offered to return the favor! Luna strolled out of the room and headed to the shower.

"Excuse me, but I have to go make up with my husband," Luna said and disappeared into the bathroom.

"I like her!" Gryffindor offered. "She's got moxie!"

"Just sod off you pervert!" snapped Harry.

"My, aren't our knickers in a bunch," the ghost mocked. "What's your problem, not getting enough tail?"

Harry stared daggers at Gryffindor.

"Oh ho!" Gryffindor chuckled. "Hermione's holding out on you!"

"Shut it!" Harry snarled.

"What did you do to piss her off?"

"Leave me alone!"

"Did you try knocking on the back door?" the ghost persisted and Harry did his best to ignore him. Perhaps, that way Gryffindor would grow bored and leave. "Did you bring up a threesome?"


"Harry, Harry, Harry," the spirit said solemnly while shaking his head. "You can't just go up to your witch and say 'How about a threesome!' You have to ease her into the idea."

"Sod off," Harry said under his breath.

"You have to start out subtly," Gryffindor continued. "Let's set up a little scenario, why don't we?"

"Let's not," Harry muttered and walked out of the room. Unfortunately, the ghost followed Harry into the Common Room.

"For example, Luna is sitting on the other side of the room. You should whisper small things in Hermione's ear like, 'Isn't Luna pretty in that dress?' or 'I prefer Luna's hair up, don't you?' That way you get a feel if Hermione is attracted to Luna…"


Harry stormed out of the Common Room and into the hall. He slammed the portrait closed but he could still hear Gryffindor shout, "What if the other witch is really hot?"

As he stomped out of the castle, Harry pondered over his mistake. He didn't really want to bring another witch into bed. In all honesty, it would be very awkward before, during, and after the act at best. Would Hermione have been jealous if he spent too much time on the other witch? Conversely, would she be irate if he didn't focus on their guest more than her because doing so would be rude and improper? Also, Harry's performance would be put to the test. With Hermione and another witch there would be four breasts and two vaginas and only one 'Harry, Jr.'. That's a lot of pressure for a bloke.

It was a stupid teenaged fantasy that Harry regretted voicing. For the rest of the day, Harry felt horrible. Guilt ate at his stomach until the bile crept up and burned his throat. He actually got physically ill because of his guilt. And Harry didn't even try to sleep. It would've been pointless to do so. His sleep would have been marred by a nightmare of a woman with too many breasts and an enormous vagina.

When he had returned to the Common Room, he saw Hermione begin to head up to her room. She looked at him contemptuously before she disappeared from view, which just made Harry feel even more pathetic and hurt.


The next morning, Harry was pleasantly surprised to have Hermione cuddle up to him on the couch.

"I heard what you said to… or yelled at… Gryffindor yesterday," Hermione informed him. "I'll glad you realized it was a mistake."

She showed Harry just how glad she was by kissing him passionately. He cupped her face and relished her kiss. He had missed her touch so much over the past few days that he was starving for more.

When they broke apart, Hermione's lips were swollen and her eyes were dark with lust. She bit her lip before saying huskily, "Let's get out of these clothes and use that paddle I got from Courtney."

The two lovers dashed up to his room and Hermione quickly opened his trunk and began rooting around in it. She pulled out his Invisibility Cloak and Marauders' Map as she asked, "You put the toys in here, right?"

"Yeah, it's under my robes," he replied and began to toe off his shoes.

In a moment, Hermione withdrew the paddle and held it high like a precious treasure.

"My bottom is going to be so-o-o-o red!" she cheered happily.

As Harry started to unbuckle his belt, a thought occurred to him; "Um, Hermione," he began.

"Yes, love?" Hermione replied while unbuttoning her blouse which appeared to be a little difficult since she was still clutching the paddle in one of her hands.

"You said you heard me yell at Gryffindor yesterday?" Harry asked.

"Yes, I was up in my room," she informed him. "I took a couple of books from the Library up there to read."

"But later, you walked by me and shot me a nasty look," Harry pointed out.

"Well, yes," she said sheepishly while loosening another button. "I thought you needed to suffer just a little bit longer."

"WHAT?" Harry cried out. "I was miserable! I was worried sick. I actually threw up! And you thought I needed to suffer even more?"

"Harry, that was in the past," Hermione said in a soft tone trying to calm Harry's anger. "But right now, I've been naughty and I deserve a good spanking followed by a wicked shag, okay?"

To prove her point, Hermione brought the paddle down on her bottom. 'Harry, Jr.' was more than willing to let bygones be bygones. All the organ really cared about was play time with Hermione. But Harry himself was quite upset. Hermione had let him stew in his own self-pity even though she had forgiven him in order to make him suffer a little longer. He buckled his belt back up.

"What are you doing?" Hermione asked.

"I reckon that I'm going for a walk," Harry said as he slipped on his shoes. 'Harry, Jr.' was protesting, the appendage wanted to play, damn it!

"But we haven't had sex in eight days!" Hermione argued.

"I'm very mad right now," Harry said slowly and turned to the door. As he walked out of the room, Hermione called out;

"You can take it out on my bum!" she cried out. "There's even a paddle for Merlin's sake!"


Harry normally didn't hold a grudge, but Hermione had pushed his buttons too much. She had toyed with him and now he was paying her back. He was still angry that she had intentionally let him suffer. He ignored her much like she had done to him.

Mind you /'Harry, Jr.' /did not like this at all. The organ voiced its complaints by strangling its baggage until they turned a nasty blue color. But Harry ignored the organ; he wanted Hermione to feel sorry for hurting him.

Hermione was a determined witch and she tried to sway Harry from his course. She first tried dropping hints in front of him by saying such things as/ "the dew is on the flower"/ and "I have an itch I can't scratch." After that failed, she resorted to less tactful hints like "Get over here, Harry, and shag me!" She even attempted to jump him while he was in the shower.

But Harry would have none of it. And he continued to ignore Hermione.


It was upon them; school was about to start.

McGonagall called Harry, Hermione, Ron and Luna into her office. It was very clear to Harry that the Headmistress was taken back by his and Hermione's appearance. Both of them had a scowl etched on their faces and bags under their eyes. It had been some time since they had last touched each other and it was showing.

"Are you two okay?" McGonagall asked.

"Fine," both Harry and Hermione replied. Well, Harry muttered a barely audible 'Fine' and Hermione bitterly snapped her response.

Pressing on, McGonagall explained, "I have created a Portkey to take the four of you to King's Cross station."

"Why?" asked Ron. "We're already here. What's the point of traveling to King's Cross just to take a train back?"

"First of all, you are a Prefect and Harry and Hermione are the Head Boy and Head Girl. Therefore at least the three of you need to be present on the train," McGonagall lectured. "Secondly, I feel that just the presence of the four of you on the train will make the other children feel comfortable. There still is a war on and if Mr. Potter is there, many people will feel safe."

"Will the Express be attacked, ma'am?" Luna asked.

"I doubt it," answered McGonagall. "The train has a number of charms and wards around it. But I think that Mr. Potter's mere presence will have a calming effect on many people."

"When do we leave?" Harry asked in a pathetic way. On one hand; his balls were aching so much that he was considering giving up on his quest to make Hermione suffer. But on the other hand, Harry was an obstinate little bugger and he wanted Hermione to pay.

"Right now," McGonagall said and pointed to a length of rope lying on the desk in front of her.

Harry saw Hermione look at Luna before the brunette witch requested "Can you give us fifteen minutes? Luna and I have to fetch something."

"We do?" Luna asked Hermione.

"Yes we do," Hermione said knowingly.

"Make it quick," McGonagall stated. Hermione grabbed Luna's hand and dashed out of the office.

In a few minutes, the two witches were running back into the office.

"Are we all set now?" McGonagall asked and Hermione nodded her head. "Very well, here are the things you and Harry need to discuss with the other Prefects on the train." The Headmistress completed this statement by handing Hermione some parchment.

After Hermione tucked the parchment in her robes, the four teens touched the Portkey and landed at King's Cross.

Over the next hour, students and their families wandered in. Harry noticed that the station wasn't nearly as full as it had been in the past. He remembered that McGonagall had anticipated that less than half the student body would be returning. By the looks of it, Harry guessed that McGonagall was overestimating a good deal.

A minute before the train was due to depart, Molly and Ginny came scrambling out of the hidden entrance to Platform 9 3/4.

"How is it that with only one kid, you still manage to be late?" Ron asked his mother.

"Oh hush, Ron. Help your sister on board," Molly retorted. The Weasley matriarch turned to Luna and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Hello Luna, how are you, dear?"

"I'm fine, mother," Luna replied. Molly glowed when Luna called her /'mother'/.

"Now keep Ron in line this year and make sure he studies," Molly told her daughter-in-law. It was clear to Harry that Molly had gotten over her anger at Ron and Luna and had finally accepted Luna.

"I will, mother," Luna kissed Molly on the cheek and climbed onto the train.

"You two behave this year," Molly told Harry and Hermione as they too boarded the train.

Once they got on, Luna walked up to Hermione and said, "I'll be in compartment six."

"Thanks Luna," Hermione said and led Harry and Ron to the Heads' Compartment. In a few minutes, Harry and Hermione were scheduled to begin the Prefect meeting.

Before they reached the Heads' Compartment though, Hermione stopped in her tracks.

"Oh, I almost forgot something," Hermione announced. "I'll be right back."

The brunette witch turned and ran back the way they had just come from.

"You two still fighting?" Ron asked as they continued to the Heads' Compartment.

"Yeah," Harry replied.

"Hey you two," Ginny said after sticking her head out of her compartment. "Have you seen Neville?"

"I think he is near the end of the train," Harry informed her and pointed down the hall.

"Thanks," Ginny said with a smile and started to head in the direction Harry pointed to.

"Wait a tic," Ron commanded. "Why the hell do you want to know where Neville is?"

"None of your business," Ginny shot back.

"The hell it is," Ron countered. "I'm your brother."

"I'm a big witch Ron. I can do whatever I want."

"Well what is it that you want to do with Neville?"

"Like I said; none of your business."

As the siblings argued, Harry felt something brush past him. He turned to see what it was but he saw nothing.

After a moment, Ron gave up and moved on to the Head Compartment.

The Head Compartment was a set up like a meeting room. A desk was at the back of the room and a few rows of seats were placed in front of it. A tablecloth with the Hogwarts' seal covered the desk.

"I see you found it okay," Hermione commented distractedly as she entered the compartment.

Harry was taken back at Hermione's appearance. When she had left him just a few seconds ago, she was looking haggard and worn out. But now she looked well rested and relaxed.

"Are you okay, Hermione?" asked Harry.

"Of course I am, Harry," Hermione responded with a song to her tone.

She walked to the table and was about to take the left seat when she stopped and looked at something under the table. Hermione then proceeded to abandon the left chair and took the right seat.

"Sit here, Harry," she said and pointed to the chair that she had almost taken.

Harry took the seat and asked once more, "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Yes I am," Hermione responded after blinking very slowly. "It is very nice of you to be concerned."

In a few moments, the Prefects from all years and houses strolled into the compartment. Harry noticed that a number of Slytherin Prefects had not returned. After all the Prefects had been seated, Harry turned to Hermione. The brunette witch returned Harry's look.

"Yes Harry?" she asked while she stared at him with her eyes wide.

"Um, McGonagall gave you the list of things to talk about," Harry pointed out.

"She did?" Hermione asked.

Harry was taken back. If he didn't know any better, he would've sworn that Hermione was on drugs she was acting so strangly.

"Yes, you put it in your robe pocket," Harry reminded her.

A rustling sound came from somewhere near Harry's feet. A second later, Hermione reached under the table and withdrew the parchment. It was obvious to Harry that she did not retrieve the paper from her robes but from somewhere underneath the table. As if someone had handed it to her. But before he could inquire as to what was going on, Hermione began the meeting.

"Very good, let's begin," Hermione stated in a sing-song voice. "First; as you've probably noticed, a number of students have decided not to return this year…"

As Hermione talked, Harry felt something tug at his zipper. He was about to recoil away from the table and hex whatever it was that pulled on his zipper when a scrap piece of paper was placed in his hand. Harry read the note written in Hermione's handwriting on the paper.

"Luna is using Polyjuice to look like me."

/ /Harry turned to Hermione to ask her what was going on. Before he could voice his question the brunette witch sitting next to him stopped reading and blinked very slowly before saying "Hello, Harry" as if she had just met him.

Then it dawned on him. The note said that Luna was using Polyjuice to look like Hermione! It wasn't Hermione sitting next to him reading McGonagall's note; it was Luna disguised as Hermione. That would explain Hermione's dreamy and distracted tone.

Harry looked down at his lap and saw Hermione's disembodied hands working on his zipper. Hermione was obviously hiding under his Invisibility Cloak and sitting under the table. In a few seconds, Hermione's hands had freed 'Harry, Jr.'

"Since there aren't as many students this year doesn't mean we, as Prefects, have an easy job," Luna continued to read.

Hermione's mouth appeared out of thin air and she engulfed Harry's penis. The raven haired wizard gasped as Hermione worked her mouth and tongue on his flaccid organ. Mind you, it wasn't limp for long. 'Harry, Jr.' got so excited to play with Hermione again after such a long time that it almost instantaneously sprang to life in her mouth.

Harry stared with wide, terror filled eyes at the group in front of him. There were sixteen people sitting no less than ten feet away from him and Hermione was giving him a blow-job! She was giving him head in a confined and somewhat crowded public space! And Harry was terrified that they were going to be discovered.

"How would it make it harder for us?" a fifth year Prefect from Hufflepuff asked Luna disguised as Hermione.

A soft slurping sound from Hermione reached Harry's ears. To him, it sounded so loud that it echoed off the walls and he was positive that everyone heard it. Harry was expecting one of the sixteen Prefects to ask/ "what's that sound?"/ any second. If Harry was thinking rationally, he would have realized that the clanking sound of the train on the tracks covered Hermione's soft slurping. But as stated previously; Harry – and men in general – do not think rationally when they are being pleasured.

"Professor McGonagall fears that because the small number of students, some bad apples will feel the need to act up," Luna answered.

"Why?" Ron asked with a touch of mirth in his voice. "Fred and George left two years ago."

A number of the people in the room laughed at the memories of havoc that the twins wrought. Harry wasn't one of them. He was trying desperately not to moan as Hermione continued to work his penis.

"That is true, Ronald," Luna offered in Hermione's voice. "But Professor McGonagall feels that some of the students who were too shy to do such things before will blossom, if you will, with a smaller class size."

Even though Harry was terrified of discovery, 'Harry, Jr.' couldn't care less about the other students just a few feet away. The organ hadn't played in so long that it seized this opportunity.

"Another issue that many people will not like is Quidditch," Luna continued.

"What about Quidditch?" Ron asked, his tone serious and deadly.

Tiny beads of sweat appeared on Harry's face. And he was quite sure that his skin was flushed and red as well. He was on the verge of a panic attack. Harry was positive that someone would somehow put two and two together, stand up and say "Hey everybody, Harry's getting a blow-job!"

/ /"The Houses are very small this year," Luna pointed out. "I doubt that there will be enough skilled flyers from each house to form a proper Quidditch team this year."

"What?" Ron and a few other Prefects shouted out in disbelief and immediately started arguing with Luna.

"Harry, you're Head Boy," Ron shouted. "Do something!"

Harry, who had not been paying as much attention to the proceedings as he should have, only heard two of Ron's words. And those two words were "Harry" and "Head." Our hero immediately believed that Ron had called him out and exposed the oral sex.

"Bu-b-bu-but I-I-I" Harry stammered in panic.

"Listen, it isn't fair to us who don't have a lot of people," a Ravenclaw argued. "We have only one returning team member this year. The other four who were supposed to come back dropped out!"

"So what?" one of the Gryffindors challenged.

A full out argument erupted. Some people were contesting that it wasn't fair to continue the games if they didn't have full teams. While the other side argued that no one should be given special treatment just because of the small House size.

While the Prefects argued amongst themselves, Luna leaned over and inspected Harry's lap. Harry could see Luna examine the fellatio with Hermione's eyes. She watched the real Hermione suck and bob on 'Harry, Jr.' for a few seconds before turning her attention to Harry and saying, "She's really good at that, isn't she?"

"Maybe we can work out an arrangement with McGonagall," one Hufflepuff suggested. "Maybe have some players from one House fill in for another team to even out the numbers?"

"What are you crazy?" Ron demanded. "There's no way in hell I'd play for Slytherin!"

"Don't worry, Weasel," one of the few Slytherins countered. "We wouldn't want you anyway!"

With a muffled grunt, Harry came. It was like a floodgate had been opened inside of him. All the tension and stress that had built up over the past two weeks just poured out of him. That and he came a lot too. It had been building up for quite some time, you see.

Panting, Harry turned to see that Luna was still watching his lap.

"Oh, she really does swallow! You are a lucky wizard!" Luna punctuated her statement with soft but elegant clapping.


All the Prefects except for Ron filed out of the compartment. Most of the prefects were still mumbling as they left. Luna, who still looked like Hermione, sauntered over to her husband.

"Ronald, I want you to take me to the loo and make love to me," Luna said in Hermione's voice.

It was as if she had slapped Ron hard across the face. He stared at her in shock. He then looked at Harry, his expression full of disbelief and worry. It was evident that Ron was worried that Harry was going to pummel him because Hermione had made a pass at him.

"H-H-Her-Hermione, are you m-m-mad?" Ron stammered.

"No, I'm not," Luna said in Hermione's voice. "I'm very randy however because I just watched Harry get oral sex and it turned me on."

"Who gave him head?" Ron squeaked. It was clear the poor wizard was completely lost and didn't have a clue as to what had just happened.

"Hermione did," Luna pointed out. "Harry is very lucky; Hermione is a talented witch who apparently likes to swallow."

"But you're Hermione," Ron stated. "How could you watch him get head when you were the one doing it?"

"I'm not Hermione, silly," Luna chuckled. "I'm your wife."

"Luna?" Ron asked.

Harry, who was still panting, only half listened to Ron and Luna's conversation. He was still coming down from his ecstasy… and Hermione was still licking his bits clean, that was very distracting to Harry, but in a good way.

"Yes, before we left the castle, Hermione and I fetched some Polyjuice from the Potions Lab as well as Harry's Invisibility Cloak," Luna explained. "Hermione wanted to make up with Harry, but he was being obstinate. So she came up with this plan, you see."

"Not really," Ron admitted.

"Well, that doesn't matter," Luna dismissed. "The Polyjuice only has a few minutes left and I want to make love to you in this form. It ought to feel extremely weird to have sex in a body with such relatively tiny titties. So let's get cracking."

Luna grabbed Ron's hand and ran out of the compartment.

"What just happened?" Harry asked.

Hermione got out from under the table and sat in her lover's lap.

"Luna is going to shag Ron," Hermione pointed out after lowering the cloak to reveal her face.

"But she looks like you," Harry stated.


"Isn't that like cheating?" Harry speculated. "I mean, yeah, Ron is having sex with Luna, but she looks like you. So wouldn't that be like having sex with you?"

"Not really. It's sort of like a very complex form of role-play," explained Hermione.

"What's a role play?" Harry asked.

"Sometimes couples pretend to be something they're not, in order to spice things up," Hermione answered. Harry gave her a puzzled look so she continued. "For example, a couple will dress up in costumes and act like they are different people. The woman sometimes dresses up as a nurse while the man dons a patient garb. The couple acts like he's a sick patient in the hospital and she pretends to be a randy nurse who seduces him.

"Instead of dressing up as a nurse and a patient, Luna used Polyjuice to change her appearance. Luna will make sure that Ron understands it is really her and not me. So it won't be cheating," Hermione concluded.

The brunette witch kissed Harry's lips before saying; "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings."

"Don't worry, you made it up to me," Harry replied with a smile. "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings too."

Harry was about to kiss Hermione when she suddenly got off of his lap and sat on the table in front of him.

"You're not getting off that easily. I showed you I was sorry with that blow-job," she said and spread her legs wide while hoisting up her skirt. Harry gulped when he saw that his girlfriend wasn't wearing any knickers. "Now it's time for you to show me you're sorry."

Harry closed his eyes and quickly thought of a snake before saying in Parseltongue "Yes-s-s, Hermione."

The brunette witch shivered with desire as Harry bowed his head into her lap. Harry could tell that she too needed release after such a long time. And he was more than happy to give it to her.

But because of the sounds of the train's brakes being engaged and the subsequent lurching caused by the vehicle's abrupt stopping, Harry wasn't able to complete his task. Instead, Hermione went sliding off the table and landed directly on his face as they both crashed to the ground. The breaks continued to squeal and Harry could hear (albeit muffled) people screaming in shock and surprise.

It took Harry and Hermione a moment to untangle themselves from each other, but the moment they did, the door to the Heads' Compartment blew up in a thousand little pieces.

"Time to pay, you little bastards," a Death Eater threatened as he stepped through the remains of the door.

To Be Continued

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