I Gave At The Office
“I Gave At The Office”
No matter how cool you think you are about things when you are a teenager, there are limits to coolness. Take when a seventeen year old guy walks into his mother’s office unannounced and sees her sucking her boss off you tend to blow it yourself – figuratively speaking, of course.
Kids know their parents fuck. If they don’t know, they are clueless as George W. Somehow I figured they both slowed down in their thirties and probably stopped entirely by the time they reached fifty. Teens have personal worldviews and many times reality need not apply for admittance.
I was aware my dad’s brother, Uncle Mark, was in his fifties and had a cute little twenty-something for a bed warmer. It was just I never thought of him actually screwing her.
My great awakening was when I decided to surprise Mom and take her to lunch. I only had three classes that Friday and decided to spend a little quality time with Mom. Mom and I both got surprised big time and “quality” did not apply to the time I had that afternoon.
I got out of class at eleven-thirty and took the bus across town from Community College to Mom’s place of work, Erickson Construction. She was head of purchasing, with a secretary of her own and everything.
I waved hi to Brenda, the receptionist and went back to Mom’s office. Brenda knew who I was and waved me on through. Elise, Mom’s secretary was not at her desk. I walked past her desk and opened the door to Mom’s office.
“Mom, I want to take you to … shit!” She was naked and on her knees. Mister Erickson stood in front of her, also naked. His wrinkled old butt cheeks sagged down behind him and his potbelly rested on Mom’s forehead.
You notice how in times of extreme surprise a person tends to note little irrelevant details? For some reason I noticed his cock was not all the way hard and his balls hung down low. His pubic hair was as gray as the hair on his head, what little he had left. It was not a pretty sight.
Now Mom was not all that much a snuggle bunny herself. She was thirty-six, spread a little around the belly and butt and maybe twenty pounds overweight. No gray hairs on her pussy, though. Okay, so she was my mother; she was also a naked female. Eyes saw naked before head reminded me she was my mother.
I heard a loud slurping noise as she sucked and he jerked his dick out of her mouth at the same time. “What the hell?” he exclaimed.
“Oh, Mom said in a weak voice.”
I turned around and beat feet out of there. Our house was up in the southeast part of Salt Lake City called the “Benches.” It cost a fortune to own up there. Numb, shocked, in mental limbo barely began to describe what I felt. I walked home from Downtown Salt Lake and tried to get a handle on things.
It was seven o’clock before I got home. Dad was gone to a meeting somewhere. He was a salesman for one of the big business systems companies and attended meetings where he could network and “enhance sales prospects.” That’s a polite way of saying he was a consummate ass kisser who made the big bucks kissing ass. One sale a year was all it took to keep him out of the food stamp line.
Mom was home. She had been crying and her makeup was running down her cheeks. She looked serious and scared when I came in the front door.
“And how was your day?” I asked. I felt angry, hurt and betrayed.
“Bobby, we need to talk,” she told me.
“About what? Don’t you know it’s not polite to talk and eat at the same time?” I paused a half beat and added, “Oh, right now you don’t have anything in your mouth. So talk.”
She slapped me a hard one. “Don’t you dare treat me with disrespect. I am still your mother.” She glared at me and waited for me to apologize.
“Are you sure you’re my mother? Do you know who my father is or is there a hatful of names and I just pick one at random and say, ‘That’s the dude.’ Is that it?” Right then I hurt real bad and I wanted to share the hurt with the one who caused that hurt.
“To be honest, the choice is limited to two men, the man I married and my lover, Carl Erickson.” She looked me straight in the eye for a moment, and then looked down at the floor.
“Well, I guess I could call Mister Erickson ‘Daddy Two,’ huh? Maybe I ought to call over to his house and tell Missus Erickson, ‘Hi this is Bobby. Let me speak to my dad.’
Her face paled. “Oh my god, don’t you dare even think of it. Do you realize the damage you could cause, the hurt to innocent people?”
“You mean, like a clueless son who sees his mom with a fat old bastard’s cock in her mouth? Is that the kind of innocent you are talking about?”
“You are making this so hard.” The tears started up again.
“Well, I’m sure as hell not hard. Let’s tell Dad and see if he gets hard.” I decided not to cut her any slack at all.
“Robert,” she told me through the tears, “Right now you have the ability to destroy five lives, counting yours and two marriages as well. Is that what you want?”
“Truthfully?” I tried to answer and broke down, “Oh Mom, how could you?”
I started blubbering. “I don’t know what I want. This is fucked.”
“Let’s go in the living room and talk,” she told me in a quiet voice. She thought a moment, “Let me freshen up.”
I nodded and went in and sat on the couch. I sat at the far end from the door and tried to think. What did I want? What should I do? Should I do anything and just let things slide instead? Hey, let’s face it, unless you are a member of a perv family, it is pretty traumatic to see your mom with some guy’s cock in her mouth.
Mom came into the room a couple of minutes later. She had washed her face and applied new makeup. She looked a lot better. “Well, what do you plan to do?” she asked. “Are you going to tell your father?”
“Whoever he may be,” I answered in a bitter voice.
“Would you knock that whining off and try to help me find a solution to our problem here?” She began to get angry.
“What do you mean, our problem? Don’t you mean your problem? I’m not the one caught sucking a cock.” I felt the need to strike back any way I could.
“No Robert,” she told me in a level voice. “Our problem.”
“What do you mean?” I asked her.
“If you tell your father…” She held up her hand as I started to make another smart assed remark. I closed my mouth.
“As I started to say, if you tell your father we will end up in a divorce court. There is no doubt about it. Your dad is a very proud man and he would not be able to forgive and forget.”
“And?” I asked.
“Where are you going to live? I sure as hell don’t want you under my roof if you willfully destroy my marriage.”
She looked me straight in the eyes and added, “Your father would not want you around him even if he had time to finish raising you. You know what they say about the bearers of bad news.”
“Uh, I grunted.”
“Dad would name Carl in any divorce proceedings and his marriage would be down the drain. Claudia Erickson is a devout Christian. Then there are their three daughters and their grand kids.” She stopped to take a deep breath.
You might want to think hard about what you will start in motion if you try to punish me for something that is not a bit of your business.”
“What do you mean it’s none of my business?”
“Have you been to bed with a girl yet?” she demanded.
“That’s none of your bus…” I stumbled over my own tongue and finished with a weak, “Oh.”
“Precisely,” she told me. She smiled faintly and continued, “I realize it is a shock to learn your parents are human too.”
I tried another tack, “But Mom, he’s a wrinkly old man. Jesus!” I could not get the vision of his gray haired old gut draped over Mom’s forehead.
“Let me tell you a secret not even your father knows. Carl was the man who took my virginity when I was a teenager reporting for work as an intern. Carl had initiated a training program to help young people who were not able to get a college education to learn a trade.
“My grades at school were terrible. I was failing and did not care. You know what my parents are like. You met them once when you were ten and never wanted to go back. Who wants to associate with drunks?”
“What does my grandparents have to do with anything?”
“Patience, Grasshopper.” She cocked an eyebrow at me. “I hated my family and our junky apartment. I was wild and destined for jail or worse. I got an interview and when Carl talked to me, he asked me, ‘you still got your cherry. Kid?’ Then he grinned at me.
“Well?” I asked her when she stopped talking.
“Robert, this is a little embarrassing.” She gave me a sheepish grin and continued, “I looked him in the eye. ‘I like to suck cocks,’ I told him. I wanted to shock him.”
I blushed. I could feel my face get warmer. “Mom!” I protested.
“Get used to it. You already had your childhood ideals shattered.”
“Well, yeah, but…” I shrugged. I mean I already caught my own mother with a fat old dude’s cock in her mouth.
“Anyway, he asked me if I swallowed and I said yes.” Mom laughed, “He said, ‘you’re hired.’ and I went to work for him. Anyway, I lost my virginity two days later on the couch in his office and I have been with him ever since.”
In spite of the revulsion I felt, I had to ask, “Well if he’s so great and you’ve been with him all that time, why did you marry Dad?”
“Carl admits that was his one great mistake in our relationship. Somewhere along the line, before I was out of my teens we had become colleagues as well as lovers.” Mom had a far away look in her eyes and she remembered.
“Once I stopped rebelling and acting the smart ass, Carl saw I was quite gifted. He got me my own apartment and spent three nights a week with me. We fell in love, deeply in love.”
Her eyes became moist and she sighed. “Carl told me he would never be able to marry me. His wife’s money had started the company and he was a minority partner.
“Claudia told him if he ever tried to divorce her she would dissolve the company and he would lose everything.” Mom explained, “Claudia loved Carl; she loves him very much. However she is a frigid Christian who cannot conceive.”
“Ah, Mom, how did we get from me seeing you in action to Jesus?” Okay, I was just a little sarcastic. I felt she had begun to give my too much information I did not ask for.”
“Carl urged me to find a boyfriend and get married. He introduced me to your father, did everything he could to pave the way for us to get together.
“I felt Carl was pushing me away. I did not want a romance with anyone else. I was happy with just Carl. Finally I started bringing your father to my apartment and I became pregnant. We got married and you arrives six months later.”
“Jesus, that sucks.” Then I blushed as I thought of what I just said.
Mom bore down on me. “Not with David. I married the most straight-laced man in town. He actually thinks necking is perverted and racy. Also he is not the most sexual man I have ever been with. In fact he drove me back to Carl. At fifty-six, Carl has more sex drive than your dad when he was twenty.”
“Ah,” I tried to tell her I was not interested in hearing how some guy gave my mother great orgasms. In my worldview, moms, sisters and other close relatives are not candidates to become fuck buddies.
There were those who thought different, but not me. Hey, I was well aware Connie Nelson and her brother Ray screwed like rabbits all the time. They admitted it. There were a couple of others I was suspicious of, but none of that for me. Norma Jean Horton gave me and a few others great head. Wanda Carter put out when I took her to the movies. That was plenty for me.
Mom brought me back to the present. “Go upstairs to your room and think about what I have told you.”
Completely out of smart assed remarks, I went. Just as I got to the second step I stopped. “Mom, I am not going to say anything.”
“I was pretty certain you would make a mature decision, honey.” She smiled at me.
“Mom, I don’t know how mature I am but I don’t care to hurt Dad. He is a nice guy.” That was and is true. Dad is a bland, nice guy who loves everybody. We were never close because we were so different. I played sports with the intensity of a fighter trying to survive in the ring. I gave my all whenever I competed.
Dad was a laid-back customer service representative who got along with everybody. I thought about that and thought some more. Dad was a big friendly guy with bland features, bland light brown thinning hair and bland everything else. He was the guy who defined bland.
I sat down at my computer and thought. When I thought of the way I described Dad and then myself, I felt my butt pucker. My description of me was that of Carl Erickson. I remembered his hair was black before it turned gray. We both had dark blue eyes and high foreheads. “Oh fuck,” I muttered to myself.
Downstairs I hunted for my mother. When I found her in the den I said, “Mom, don’t you think it would be more honest if I changed my name to Erickson? You gave me my biological father’s middle name, didn’t you?”
She got a “here we go again” look on her face and sat back in her chair. “Sit down Robert.” She had tears in her eyes.
Oh god, if I could only do it all over again.” She thought a moment and amended her statement, “If only Carl and I could do it all over again.”
“Well I wouldn’t be here if you did.”
“Oh no, may son, you would definitely still been here but I would have insisted Carl divorce her and we take off together. If I had threatened to leave him, He would have gotten a divorce. We would have been penniless if we took off together. The difference is we would have had us and Carl would have raised you.
“Carl refused to run off with me because if he left her she would have made certain he was unemployable. Her family has the money to do whatever it took to ruin him.”
“That’s where Dad came in.” It seemed so wrong to make dad a victim in this soap opera.
“Your dad is a weak man who was destined to go nowhere. He drank too much and permitted life to overwhelm him. Carl used him to be the husband I needed in order to have you and be protected.”
I started to speak and she held up her hand. “Wait, there is more. You see I truly care for your dad. He is a thoroughly nice person I have grown to love…”
“But were never in love with,” Dad’s voice said from the door.
“Dad!” I exclaimed. For some reason I felt guilty.
“Oh dear,” Mom whispered.
“I’ll pack a bag and leave.” he walked upstairs. Mom had a lost look on her face, a sort of little girl lost look.
I followed Dad upstairs. “I just found out today,” I told him.
He nodded and began to pack. He turned and looked at me. “I only wish I had been a better father to you.” That was the best description of Dad. His world was falling apart and he regretted he had not done better by me.
We hugged and I went back downstairs. Mom was gone.
Dad came down with a Val pack and a suitcase. “I’ll let you know where I move to. I imagine I shall stay with a friend of mine from church. We have been quite close for a few years.”
My stomach did another lurch. “Dad? You have a girlfriend?” This was unbelievable.
“Bobby, the emphasis is on friend. We are not and have not been involved except as friends.” He looked embarrassed at what he admitted to me.
“You mean you have never… ah…” How in hell do you as your dad if he has porked someone?
“We almost did once. It was right after bible study one evening. However we had a cup of coffee instead.” I almost lost it then. Coffee over orgasms?
He saw the look on my face. He was defensive as he told me, “Son, some people are not as passionate as others.”
I nodded. “Dad, I’m going to miss you.”
“Not to worry, Bobby, we’ll get together and do stuff together.” Of course we never did.
I watched him drive off and sat and thought. When Mom got back, I told her, “Dad has a girlfriend.”
“What?” She stared at me open mouthed. “Impossible.”
The humor of it all brought me out of my sad feeling. “Yeah. What’s more, they almost did it once and decided to have a cup of coffee instead.” I explained the romantic, platonic non-sexual love affair.
Mom started to laugh and to cry and to laugh some more.
“Mom!” I exclaimed. “Are you all right?”
“Maybe we can send him a case of Viagra as a wedding present.” She began to hoot and yell and make all sorts of weird noises.
I got scared and grabbed her purse. I pulled out her cell phone and fast dialed Carl’s phone number. “Erickson residence,” their maid answered.
I told her who I was and asked to speak to Mister Erickson. His wife Claudia came on and asked what I wanted. I explained Mom was having difficulties over something that happened at work and Mister Erickson should come over and help her straighten things out.
“Should I come too?” she asked and I almost lost it.
“Ah no ma’am, if Mister Erickson will come, that will be all that is needed.” I wondered if old people could cum twice in the same day?
“You weren’t there so I doubt if you would be able to help. Mom is thinking about a change or something.” Hey, I had to tell her something.
Claudia Erickson thought I meant Mom planned to quit. “Oh dear no!” she exclaimed. “After all the other financial reversals the company is all we have right now. Your mother is all that keeps Erickson out of the red.”
This was interesting. “I think Mister Erickson can get Mom straightened out and satisfied. Can I tell her he is coming?” I do love my little puns.
“Oh my yes, I’ll tell him to come quickly.”
I thought to myself Mom would rather he came slowly. I told her, “Mom will be relieved.”
Carl rang our bell ten minutes later. “Hello Father, Mom is in the den having a nervous breakdown. Be gentle with her.” He looked at me like I was from another planet and went into our den with the accuracy that told me he had been there before.
“I’m going up to my room,” I told them. They did not hear me.
I went back down a couple of hours later. They were still in the den, fucking like bunnies. I telephoned Missus Erickson and said, “It looks like they are going to be pulling an all nighter. I thought I should call you and let you know.”
Still in panic mode she asked, “Your mother isn’t going to still leave, is she?”
“No ma’am, Mom and Mister Erickson are real close right now. I think they should come together any time now.” Just then I heard a loud moan from the den.
“What was that?” she asked.
“What was what?” I asked.
“That horrible howling noise. Didn’t you hear it?”
“Maybe it was on your end of the phone line. I don’t hear any noise here.” My father needed to cum quietly.
“Perhaps,” she said in a doubtful voice. “You tell Mister Erickson to do something to show her how much we appreciate her.”
“Well, perhaps he can take us to breakfast in the morning if they get done in time. I promise I’ll make him feed Mom something special.” I looked up and saw Carl Erickson. He was naked and staring at me.
“You tell Carl to hire you as your mother’s assistant. You seem very mature for your age.”
“Yes ma’am, I’ll tell Mister Erickson to hire me.” She thanked me and disconnected.
“You are a god damned smart ass, aren’t you?” He still had an erection.
“Hey, don’t point that thing at me. It might be loaded.” I grinned at him.
“What was that conversation all about?” he asked.
“I told Missus Erickson you and my mom were going to pull an all nighter and she said for me to make certain you fed Mom.”
I grabbed a soft drink and went back upstairs. I turned at the head of the stairs and called, “Why don’t you two take it into the bedroom? Watch out for whisker burns.”
Carl hired me as an intern when I graduated from school. Then he threw me a curve ball. I became the only intern with an intern of my own. That was Mom’s suggestion, I’m positive.
The third one I interviewed was a pouty-faced little thing who ignored me and asked how it was an intern had an office of his own. She asked a few other questions and I answered them.
When she run down, I asked, “Do you still have your cherry”
“What did you just say?”
I tried again, “Do you suck cock?”
She looked at me kind of funny. “What?”
“Also, do you swallow?” She started to leave.
“More important, do you have any brains?” That stopped her.
She finally caught on and asked, “When do I get my own intern?”
“Never,” I hope. I smiled and added, “I intend to do things right the first time around.