As i finished my work last night, i had trouble concentrating. Your putting me on cum restriction made me able to think of nothing else! i finished my work and went to bed, only i couldn't sleep. i masturbated and decided to blow off the restriction, but changed my mind when it was almost too late. i stopped myself and did not cum. It is important to me to take this very seriously and follow the directions for my punishment. After all, not following directions is what got me into this predicament in the first place.
i hugged my pillow tight and squeezed my thighs together and eventually drifted off to sleep. i dreamed about women on my bed, holding my legs and licking my clit and sucking my breasts and nipples. They were kissing the most delicate areas of my neck and running their hands all over me. i have never cum in a dream, but that was very close. No relief, even in sleep!
When i got up this morning, i took a shower and did my first 5 minutes of the day. i waited until i was done bathing and then fingered myself for 5 minutes. i have a shower radio with a clock on it so i was able to time myself.
i put my left foot up on the ledge and fingered my clit with my left hand. i massaged it very eagerly at first, because i was so horny, but then i realized that if i kept up that pace i would cum before the 5 minutes was up.
i slowed down and lightened my touch, and dipped into my pussy with my middle finger several times. When i had just over a minute left, i just slowly massaged my clit area with my hand very flat, not applying any direct pressure. It stimulated me incredibly, but i could not cum from it in the minute i had left. When the minute was up, i stopped and my whole pussy/ovaries were fairly spasming with desire.
i rinsed my slutty cunt with cold water from the hand-held shower massage; it killed but had the desired effect – it cleaned me and quelled my desire a little.
i have to go now, i will give a report of the masturbation breaks i take throughout the day. i will not cum.
The first report i sent you was for the 8 o clock hour (pacific time). i left for my destination at 9:20am and arrived at 9:47am. i stopped on the way to buy mini pads, because already i was getting wet, thinking about my next "break". i knew this would be happening to me ALL DAY and so i NEEDED those pads.
i parked at a meter and found a bathroom in a restaurant next to my destination. Thankfully it was one of those restrooms where only 1 person could enter the room at a time (just 1 toilet & sink in 1 room with a lockable door) – not a room with many stalls.
i didn't have much time, so i had to get right to it. i put my stuff down, went over to the toilet, and put my left foot up on the seat. I grabbed the bar on the wall for support and slipped my left hand down my pants. I tilted my right wrist towards me while still holding onto the bar to see my watch and it was 9:51am.
i began fingering myself eagerly, like the first time, but was ready to cum in about 12 seconds! i kept the speed the same, but moved my hand away from my clit a little to reduce the intensity. i was still feeling like i might cum, but i slowed my breathing. Taking deep breaths and watching my watch. i plunged my fingers into my pussy for some juice and came back and massaged it all over my clit.
Now my clit was so slippery that i had to really work for the friction. i had less than a minute to go, and was fairly panting at this point. For the rest of the minute, i slowed down and simply circled my clit with my middle finger very slowly and lightly, breathing deeply and slowly.
When the 5 minutes was up, i shakily pulled my hand out of my pants, pulled my foot down off of the toilet seat, pulled my pants down and wiped (twice) and applied a mini pad.
That left me 4 minutes to get to my appointment at the building next door, which i made on time. i was then kept waiting of course. The meeting i had come for finally began and i excused myself at 10:50am to use the restroom. Being an office, it too had an exclusive bathroom. i did the same thing i did in the 9am hour, only i STARTED with the slow, light circles and that is all i did for the entire 5 minutes.
My nipples were hard as rocks and i felt shaky and shallow of breath as i replaced my soaked mini-pad with another and washed my hands. i hoped my lust didn't show in my eyes when i returned.
i was out of my meeting by 11:30am. i went back to my car and headed for the department store i needed to stop at that is back near my house. Due to some construction, i didn't make it there until almost noon. i ran inside and went to the bathroom. i had to pee badly, so i went, wiped, and at 11:56 began masturbating. The only thing i could do without cumming was to make my fingers very flat, so that i got no intensity whatsoever, and massage my clit. That was difficult enough to do without cumming. Believe it or not, i could still feel safe enough in that bathroom, with people coming and going in the stalls around me (no pun intended) that i felt i might cum. i finished at 12:01pm. i removed my hand and just sat there on the toilet.
i felt like my ovaries were dancing and i was squeezing my pussy HARD against the air; i even tried to pee again, trying to get SOME relief, any relief … none was found!!!!! i replaced my soaked mini-pad and continued on my day.
i am home now, and typing this out at 12:40pm pacific. i feel it is time for another round of my punishment, so i will do it sitting here.
Ok, it has been 5 minutes now. This time i leaned way back in my computer chair, put my hand down my pants and inserted my index and middle finger into my pussy. i fucked hard for 5 minutes and did not cum, although the knuckle of my thumb was lighly massaging my clit the whole time. i breathed steadily, kept my eyes open and on the screen, and thought about why i was being punished.
It took this long for it to sink in how important this lesson is. To never cause the disruption of Your pleasure should always be my goal! i am undeserving of pleasure and release and am receiving none. However, You are deserving of uninterupted pleasure and release and my bad behavior prevented that!
i am horny and shaky and living on the edge of release, but am ready to finish out my day's pushishment soberly and attentively!